Since April of last year, I’ve been working on my book, Unmasking Your Soul. I’m currently in the process of finishing up the last chapter which is about the embodiment of the Christ consciousness. And, I can tell you without a doubt that I’ve lived every word that I’ve written. As painful as it’s been at times, it needed to happen this way so I could heal what was hidden from plain sight. Knowing what I know now, it’s quite clear, that as much as we all want to ignore our shadow side, it’s impossible to do if you want to live a life that supports you emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. It’s only when you’re willing and able to work with your shadow that you can elicit the darkness into the light so it can be transformed and healed. The more you heal and transform, the more light you hold within your vessel to serve yourself and your tribe.
Recently, in the midst of writing my final chapter, I had a very powerful experience. I was doing my morning meditation and had the most beautiful experience. It was purely magical. Within minutes I had gone to this plane of consciousness where I was one with the universe. For hours I was in this state of bliss, peace, and love. But, then, the unexpected happened. I went from bliss into deep chaos. I’ve never had a panic attack before, but this certainly felt like one. I became completely overwhelmed in fear. My ego was saying things like, “You’re not ready for this. You’re not ready to serve at this level. You don’t deserve this. Who do you think you are?”
Wow, I didn’t expect that. I was standing in the realm of duality that pervades our existence every day on this earth plane. I could sense both parts of me duking it out. One part of me was fighting for love, while the other was fighting for survival. One part of me loved the feelings of bliss and peace, but, at the same time, there was a part of me that was terrified of those feelings because I was still holding a mistrust of my own Divinity and the Divine in general.
I knew I needed help so I reached out to friends and family and asked them to send me healing light. And, then, I called my healer and asked to see her right away. I am so grateful for this woman for I wouldn’t be where I am today without her presence in my life. The healing was deep and rich in insight. My body had gone into a fight or flight mode. Because of the trauma I had been holding in my energy field, as soon as this new loving energy began to get grounded in my body, the trauma was awakened into a state of ‘run for your life.’ I had been working on this trauma for years.The good news was that we had reached that very final layer of the trauma. The not so good news was that sometimes that can be the most difficult to deal with.
The guidance from the Divine was to drop everything I was doing and tend to my inner garden. My inner world needed to be nourished and attended to immediately. You see, when you’re ready to shift into a higher vibration and become more of who you really are at your core, what is holding you back from attaining that, will show itself very loudly and clearly. That’s not a bad thing. You can only heal what you can feel. So when it comes to the surface, that’s actually a really good thing. That means you are ready to heal it.
And so, as guided, I dropped everything and continued my journey of healing. Every day, I worked with my guides to move through this chaos, a sign from my Soul that I was ready to shift into a deeper part of myself, a deeper expression of my gifts, and a higher vibration of love. This was the key for me. I was being pushed to a place of acceptance, love, and oneness with the Divine.
I continued to ‘lean in’ to the universe, doing my part so that God and the universe could see that I was serious about changing my life and releasing this part of me that had been holding me prisoner for all these years. Every day, the meditations became richer and deeper. Until one day, it happened. The big breakthrough. I saw myself breaking free from the chains. I proclaimed to the universe that I was ready to begin the new leg of my journey, one founded in love, service, and truth. I made a commitment at a Soul-level to show up authentically in all I do, no matter what others may say or do.
Then, I had a magnificent insight about my birth name Eileen. I remember asking my mom years ago how she had chosen my name. She said she was sitting in the hospital room and was reading a newspaper and saw an actress with that name. She said she immediately knew she needed to give me that name. But, I always felt there was more to my name that had been divinely orchestrated. You see, even your birth name, holds deep meaning for you. It holds a particular vibration that is part of your Soul’s journey.
Part of my breakthrough was understanding that the solution had been there all this time right in front of me, yet I couldn’t see it. One of my core lessons was conveniently hidden in my name. When you break down my name phonetically, the answer becomes clear. God wanted me to ‘lean in’ and allow myself to be supported by the universe. He wanted me to give him my worries and surrender to my Soul’s Divine plan. I finally got the message. This is what happens to all of us. The insight comes only when you’ve lived the experience to the fullest and learned the lesson. Then, what was once hidden becomes clear.
And, during the course of all this happening and the up-leveling of my vibration, I had two more Divine gifts come online. An ancient light language began to come through my vessel. On a human level I didn’t understand what I was saying, but on a Soul level it felt familiar and extremely powerful. Each time I spoke it, I knew I was invoking the powerful force of the universe that lives within me to shift and heal at a cellular level. And, not too long after, another gift came online. A collective consciousness of 227 Souls began to speak through me. They call themselves Ishtar.
You see, when you shift into the vibration that matches the God-seed that carries your Divine gifts, that God-seed hatches and births right inside of you. This is how your Divine gifts come online. The higher power that lives within you encoded your being with that level of intelligence. Imagine that? Now I understood why I had spent most of my life fearing my greatest asset. My voice, my greatest gift, was what had created the mistrust in the first place. In past lives, I had been persecuted for using my greatest Divine powers. But, finally, I was free!
So where are you holding back and masking your greatest gifts? Your feelings and emotions are the signposts and the clues to where you’re not in alignment with your Soul’s purpose. This is the first place to look. Here’s a short ritual you can use to begin to unlock your Divine gifts:
- Close your eyes and begin taking some deep breaths. When, you feel relaxed, drop your conscious mind into your heart. If you’ve never done this before, you can imagine taking an elevator from your conscious mind down into your heart.
- See or feel yourself surrounded in the most beautiful rainbow light. Each swirl of light entering the top of your head and awakening every cell within your body. The rainbow light swirls within you and all around you. As it does, you are lifted into this pureness of love and stillness.
- Now, invoke the presence of your Higher-Self to join you there in your heart center. You have the power to call forth this Divine part of you with words of love and praise. Feel or see the presence of your Higher-Self joining you in your heart space.
- Ask your Higher-Self to help you discover where you’re holding back your light, magnificence, and Divine gifts. Begin to see or feel emotions come to the surface as you do this. Pay attention closely. Where are you feeling anger, resentment, sadness, hatred, grief or fear? Where are these emotions held in your body? Remember, your greatest fear is usually the biggest clue to something you hold that is very unique to you that only you can do in the world the way God encoded it within you. Stay here for several minutes until you begin to have some clarity on what you’re experiencing.
- Now, ask your Higher-Self to help you identify what you need to do to heal this part of you so that you can awaken more deeply to your Divine purpose and gifts. Stay here until you receive at least one message or action step that will move you forward towards your Soul’s purpose.
- When you feel complete, begin to slowly feel the presence of your body. Start to move your hands, torso, and feet. When you’re ready, you can open your eyes.
- Take several minutes to journal any insights from your experience. And, commit to taking at least one step forward in Unmasking Your Soul.
Love and peace to you always~
P.S. If you need help connecting with your Soul and unlocking your Divine powers, then check out my SoulLove Mastery Private Mentoring Program. This is exactly what it’s meant for. Together we Unmask Your Soul so you can become more of who you really are.
Eileen Anümani Santos is an interfaith minister, transformational healer, artist, singer, international bestselling author, and spiritual guide whose mission is to heal and awaken the hearts and minds of those seeking to live a more authentic and Soul-driven life.